Pravilo 5 minuta spašava vezu u samoizolaciji

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Petra Haleš

Apr 05, 2020

Vrijeme samoizolacije koje provodimo s partnerom unutar 4 zida neminovno dovodi do češćih trzavica, ali i žestokih svađa koje mogu ozbiljno narušiti vezu. Ovo pravilo može vam pomoći.

Dosadašnji tempo života i svakodnevne obveze nisu nam ostavljale dovoljno vremena za našeg partnera. Pojavom pandemije koronavirusa ovo se drastično promijenilo. Veliki broj partnera trenutno se nalazi u samoizolaciji i zajedno su doslovno 24 sata na dan.

Zajednički boravak unutar 4 zida, svaki dan 24 sata, sigurno će kod pojedinih veza dovoditi do češćih trzavica, češćih prepiranja zbog banalnih sitnica, ali i češćih svađa koje u konačnici mogu dovesti do trajnog prekida veze.

Rješenje ovog problema je pravilo 5 minuta koje je na svom Instagram profilu objavila influencerica Grace Hazel.


Pogledajte ovu objavu na Instagramu.

THIS is the most important thing I have ever learnt about relating in relationships. Concious and Non Violent Communication ✌🏼: PART TWO. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Quite a few of you were up for finding out more about this.. The other day I read an article named “hilarious things I’ve learnt about my partner since working from home during isolation”. Folks were having all sorts of insights, like finding out their significant other is a “just to clarify” guy or “let’s circle it back” kinda person. But what if actually all this lock down malarkey is bringing all sorts of deep, uncomfortable shade around your relationship to surface? What tools can you adopt to keep the peace, love present? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Concious and Non Violent Communication, that’s what. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ So what is Non Violent Communication? I’ve pulled some great stuff from an article on lifelessons.com, written by Michael Frank. It interviews Alan Seid who explains it way better than my frazzled lil brain can in the midst of 30 degree Indian heat in. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Here is is… ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “Non Violent Communication is about how we express our honesty in such a way that our perspective is most likely to be received with understanding, and our needs are most likely to be met in a way that’s in harmony with other people’s needs. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ On the listening side it’s about how we receive what might be coming at us, even when it sounds like an attack or blame or criticism or a judgment, and how we listen for the other person’s needs and values so that we’re standing in a more compassionate place, so that we’re less likely to get defensive, and most likely to diffuse a potential conflict.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Back to my feels.. If something is bothering you, instead of shouting “oi, you bloody idiot, I hate it when you >>insert thing that absolutely fucks you off here<<, it makes me so mad”. Instead, take a moment to breathe and gather yourself. Ask your partner if now is a good time and say that you’d like to express something tender to them. Use the phrases from the 2nd image of this post (by Marshall. B. Rosenburg) to support yourself to communicate and listen. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ (MORE BELOW IN COMMENTS)

Objavu dijeli Sexual Healing Coach (@grace___hazel)

O čemu se radi?

Pravilo 5 minuta je jednostavna vježba komunikacije između partnera u kojoj svatko ima pet minuta za reći drugoj strani kako se osjeća, ali bez svađe i napadanja. Grace to naziva “nenasilnom komunikacijom”.

“Ako nešto želite riješiti, pokušajte postaviti alarm na pet minuta od trenutka kad ste uzeli riječ. U tih pet minuta recite svoje argumente i stavove, pri čemu je drugoj osobi zabranjeno da vas prekida na bilo koji način. Nakon što vaših pet minuta istekne, osoba koja je slušala ima svojih pet minuta da vam objasni što je ona čula od toga što ste rekli. Nakon toga, partner dobiva svojih pet minuta da kaže što misli”, napisala je Grace.

Na ovaj način možete “nenasilno” pregovarati, izmjenjujući uloge svakih pet minuta, sve dok ne dođete do točke gdje ste se složili.

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